Four Up, Four Down -- Madness 2012, Finals Predictions
Source Rhydin Newswire
By Colin Talvitie courtesy of The Ringside Post
April 20, 2012
Hey, you know, this is great. You toil away for years and years, watch countless hours of tape, write umpteen articles (that get hacked to death by witless editors*) and field complaint after complaint like "Gosh, Colin, can't you be nicer to the people who suck? When you tell them they suck, they feel bad and gollygee, we can't have that Up with sensitivity and emotional coddling! Down with truth!"
And now? All you whiny prats can piss the hell off -- your Governor knows talent when she reads it, and that's probably why she is where she is!
Imagine me, Colin Talvitie, forever known as the recipient of a Governor's Service Medal! Hell, I didn't know that just doing my job could get me one of those things (Captain Futility getting one too almost, but doesn't quite, take the luster off) but hey, when you're good, you're good, and good gets recognized. Good call, Governor! And my thanks!
Now, as for the upcoming Madness Finals Match...we've got anger (Guaire) vs. slobber (Tass). I didn't think Tass would make it this far in and picked him to lose way before now, but here he is anyway. Let's take a closer look at both journeys through Madness.
Tasslehofl's Opponent Seedings: 15th, 7th (forfeit), 6th, 5th, 7th
Guaire's Opponent Seedings: 2nd, 7th, 3rd, 1st, 7th
Guaire's definitely hauled the tougher road so far, knocking off his division's 1st, 2nd, and 3rd seeds! Tass hasn't fought anyone higher than 5th and got a pass in the Round of 32 when his opponent didn't bother to show up. Both defeated 7-seeds to make it into the Finals.
Guaire's giving up an average of 3.4 points per duel (a number skewed high due to the 8.5-7.0 score in the Sweet Sixteen) while Tass gives up 3.1 per duel (with 1 less duel to factor in, due to his forfeit victory). What's that tell us? It's not easy to score a lot of points against either of these guys. I'm betting Tass trips over his own kissy-face drool at least once during the match to give Guaire a free point.
Given that three of Guaire's matches have ended in a 5-2 score and that he's consistently knocking off high seeds in this tournament, I'm thinking he hasn't come this far to go home empty-handed. Seedings and oddsmakers be damned; Guaire oughta be the favoured dueler in this matchup. Like it or not, Guaire's your 2012 Madness Champion.
As for a final score, I'm going 5-3 Guaire, with an outside shot at 5-4 Guaire. We'll see if I'm right soon enough and hell, I might even go to this match live and in person! I'm sure that sets all your hearts aflutter.
Colin Talvitie
Staff Writer
*DZN Editor's note: Colin's referring to the editors at the Ringside Post.
Copyright 2012 The Ringside Post
This article brought to you by
| Red Orc Brewery | 
Where's YOUR Badsider? |
|
|
